Am I Selfish? (A Jimin stan thing)


As I lay on my bed at this late hour, I stare at the ceiling and start to think of you.

And just like any other night, I wish and I pray for you to end up with me... for me to end up with you--- for us to end up together.

You have no idea-- not even a tiny bit-- about my existence, about how I feel towards you, about how I try to stop my tears from escaping my eyes every time I realize that you're not for me and that you will never be.

Funny how I ended up falling for someone I barely know. Funny how I ended up falling for someone who doesn't know me. Funny how I regret nothing-- not a single bit. Because loving you felt like you were really mine.



But will it sound selfish if I wanted you only to myself? If I say that I want you to flash your beautiful smile to no one but me?

My eyes are starting to get heavy, and as I doze off to dreamland it's still you I'm wishing to see. Jalja, my Jiminie. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I Wonder if...

Image
As a teenager, I have a lot of things, random things, going on in my mind. I always wonder if an average girl like me, has a bright and wonderful future ahead. I wonder if I'm important to someone. I wonder if I'm worth the wait, if I'm worth the risk, or if I'm worth fighting for. I wonder if people remember me the same way I always remember them. Or if they smile when they hear my name. I wonder if I can be as smart as anyone else, or as talented, or even as beautiful as they are. I wonder if I'm worth anything. I wonder why I'm so insecure about my looks and my capacity to do things when I know to myself that I shouldn't be. Maybe because I pressure myself too much. Or maybe I'm just overthinking. Maybe I AM worth fighting for. Maybe I AM worth something, anything. Maybe I AM smart. Not as smart as they are but I know I am. Maybe I AM talented and beautiful in my own way. I may not see it because of my insecurities. Maybe ...
Read more

Meet Her

Image
There's this girl that I've known for quite a long time. Long enough for me to know everything about her. I've been with her from our childhood days, up until now. I know every detail about her, from her looks, her flaws... everything. Back then, she used to be so carefree. She does everything with enthusiasm, always excited to try new things. She was never afraid of failure because she knows that if she fails, then she will learn. She always speaks up; gives her honest opinions and I swear, you'll never see a hint of hesitation coming from her. She never loses her confidence, it was always with her wherever she went. You know, if confidence was a person, it was probably her "best-est" friend. They were inseparable. I will never forget how she always volunteers to join activities; dancing, singing, contests --- and how she never regrets a thing if she didn't win. She was as talkative as a curious toddler, there was never a day that...
Read more